My healing journey with clay and horses
Why clay and horses?
I have been on a massive healing journey and spiritual awakening since the death of my 17 year old son, Sam, in October 2021. It rocked my world and nothing really seemed to matter anymore. Deep grief set in and I could barely function. I didn't work for 10 months. We moved from our home of 24 years. Everything changed. I needed to find some ground and some hope.
I had a history with horses. My daughter and I had them when she was growing up. It was something I had to give up as my son needed more of me. I thought I was done with horses. I had not had one in my life for 15 years. Then one day I was visiting the ranch where my daughter keeps her horse and this golden girl was there. I had gone to see the babies after a tough day with grief. I loved on one of the gypsy babies and noticed a palomino. I asked my daughter "who's that?" "Oh, that's Sunny, she's for sale...." uh oh.... I wasn't looking for a horse. It was not on my radar. But there she was and I had this excited feeling like I was 5 years old. I could not stop thinking about her. I was taking selfies with her. I was in deep trouble! The second time I saw her I just knew. That's my horse. I cannot explain it. She was there for me. Now to tell my husband. His first comment was "I thought you were done with horses." I did too. But she's my horse, I explained. Luckily, he knows me quite well (married for 31 years!) and knew that this was no joke. She had come for me. Within a couple of weeks she was officially mine. My golden angel horse. An absolute gift. When I am with her I am present. Grounded. Focused. Healing. Growing. I feel like we have known each other for years. I am so grateful.
My clay journey is more recent. I felt the urge and started taking classes in June of 2021. My birth mama was a potter and she was calling me to this incredible medium. When Sammy passed I didn't touch clay for months. Then one day I got the nudge and received a sign (I absolutely believe in signs!). So I went back to my ceramics class. When we moved into our home in Placerville there was a room that was perfect for an art studio. Then came the kiln. Now I was in business!
Clay is so grounding. You must be absolutely present when working with it. It demands your attention. It's so amazing to take what is essentially dirt and create something beautiful out of it. The transformation is mesmerizing. Through a process of pounding, joining, forcing and firing a new thing is created. It's magical!
Is healing ever complete? I don't know for sure. I am still on that journey. My boy is with me as I continue to take care of myself and do things that help me to continue and have hope. He's a very creative soul who encourages me to have that child like wonder. To do the things that sing to my soul and make me feel alive.
Thanks for being here
Thank you for joining me in this space. I would love to hear what has helped you in your healing journey.
The experience of spending quiet time with the horses with your guidance and grounding was truly lovely, thank you. I noticed so many feelings move through me as I spent time with each horse. And the experience of feeling one of the horses helping me to regulate my breathing with theirs calmed me and it felt like a wonderful connection to such a beautiful creature. I appreciate your knowledge and wisdom and the opportunity to experience the gifts of these beautiful horses.
I was so grateful to have been a part of the Strength Totem workshop last weekend. Wendy created a warm and welcoming space. The grounding meditation in the beginning set a calm and relaxing feeling right from the start. I felt safe to explore my strengths and create from a deep place of knowing. Wendy’s knowledge in working with clay was a helpful and supportive guide in allowing me to feel successful in what I wanted to come through the clay. And I was so grateful to meet new friends and share in the experience with them. Thank you for sharing Wren Studio with me and others. You have created a sacred and special place to explore and create, wha…